By rights, the Odyssey Nightclub ought to be one of those places your mother would hate you going to. Technically it's on Davie Street, but really, it's down a dark back street and you might well have trouble finding it if you weren't familiar with the area. You can't really see anything that much from the outside and it doesn't look all sparkly and new like Celebrities Nightclub Nightclub does. But then if you only did things that your mother wanted you to do, you probably wouldn't be reading the writings of a wildchild transexual from England who travels the world searching for the ultimate party vibe, would you?

OK, if you're feeling guilty about your mother now, there are plenty of ballroom dancing clubs you can take her to in Vancouver. But for those of you who want to be the belle of the ball, or those of you who are looking for a belle to ball, kiss Ma goodnight and tell her not to wait up; the Odyssey is one wicked place to party.

Lisa and me out in Vancouver, though this was at Celebrities Nightclub Nightclub. Damn you short passable Asian babes, you even make my bra show through!

Off of the beaten track and out of the bright lights always means one thing - you've found a place the locals hang out. I would probably never have found the place if it wasn't for the delightful Lisa, my beautiful Asian friend who took me there the first time. Lisa gets nervous going out in case a friend from work spots her, but let's face it, the Odyssey is down a dark alley. Anyone else who is there is a guilty as you are! However unlike Celebrities Nightclub, it's still much more underground and probably many of the people who feel comfortable in the bright lights of Celebrities Nightclub would feel uneasy in Odyssey. I'll tell you why in a minute.

When you get there, there's a little booth where you are supposed to pay your cover fee. I have no idea what they charge exactly other than it's less than Celebrities Nightclub do. Why? Because I've never paid! I just walk up, smile at the guy behind the counter and run inside! I understand it's about $7-$10 a head on average but don't quote me on that.

The first thing you find is a big courtyard area - the only licensed patio in Vancouver. It has a cover so you won't get rained on, but otherwise is open, it's much like a pub garden in England. Out here you can normally find half the club since Canadian law doesn't allow people to smoke inside. It's a big plus as at Celebrities Nightclub there is a tiny smoke room (the fumegator is probably a better description of the shoulder to shoulder chimney room - don't do it or you'll never be able to return that dress!). Sonar isn't any better.

At Odyssey, the smoke room is like the social room with seats and enough noise from inside spilling out to keep it lively. Being that whatever Jesus creeper wearing, raw organic sunflower seed chewing, kill joy of a party-pooper that invented the law of no drinking AND smoking in Canada has probably gone to bed by the time that the nightclubs in Vancouver open, why shouldn't those who've gone out of their way to visit such a place for the sole purpose of getting sh#t faced up be allowed some simple fun? If Canadians didn't smoke, I could understand it, but we are talking about Vansterdam here! I mean... this is home town of Marc Emery and the BC Marijuana Party right? All those squeaky clean ones who say they never smoke during the day can be found puffing away at night and the Odyssey has by far the most superior smoking facilities in the whole of Vancouver. Well yes, OK, save for Smokestacks where you can go to smoke pot whilst listening to Led Zepplin and supping a tea. How delightfully English!

Inside the Odyssey there are a couple of bars with a moderate helping of tables and chairs between them and framing that is a balcony overlooking the a dancefloor. From there, you can get a pretty good view of the naked shower dancing hunks who perform their often. The club is a lot darker than Celebrities Nightclub inside and there is a lot less posing going on. And the music is a harder, darker, deep house/trance vibe that's suprisingly close to a UK or Ibizan club, even though you'd need to double or triple the sound system to even be in the ballpark of a small club like the Pink Punters in Milton Keynes. I liked the music, and even though I do concede that Canada is a lot better for live rock music, as far as dance goes, the Odyssey was stomping everytime I went. It was overall my favourite for music in Vancouver and that comes from someone used to big name cutting edge DJs in UK like Lisa Pin Up, Seb Fontaine and Andy C.

Does it show that Vancouver is a capital of the film industry? You rarely get costumes this out there in London...

Compared to Celebrities Nightclub, the crowd at Odyssey is a lot less formal. People are a lot more wasted, a lot more talkative and there is a real happy vibe going on. I had a real crazy time each time I went, from the first time I went there with Lisa and was rescued from a guy who wasn't taking no for an answer by a charming young model of a man, to the second time when a Belgian man burst into my toilet cubicle and challenged me to a peeing contest to the third time when an Ashley Simpson lookalike got decidedly curious about what stage of transition I was at and whether it would impede my performance...

Needless to say, people's openness at Odyssey was extremely endearing and although I never took up any of the many offers I was given, the flattery of it all made for great flirty fun and the best party atmosphere I enjoyed of all the many places I've been in Vancouver. The crowd are best described as try-sexual, in that there are only a few people so vehermently homosexual in the place they won't enjoy the affections of the many straight guys and girls who also attend. Short of a dining experience in BC Watermelon's kitchen followed by hot tub evening with your favourite person, you'll need to hunt hard to find a better all round party than the Odyssey. It's fun, it's friendly, it's fear-free and it's got a great crowd. Enjoy it before the tourists take over or the government closes down Davie Street!

Odyssey Nightclub Review:

• Type: GLBT Friendly Nightclub
• Location: Davie Street, Downtown Vancouver, Canada
• Entry: Cover charge varies according to the night - expect it to start from about $7 an always to be a couple of bucks cheaper than Celebrities Nightclub Nighhtclub
• Facilities: Dance floor and balcony, bars and an outside covered area
• Plus Points: Very relaxed vibe amongst a largely young local crowd open to all persuasions. Good place to get off your trolley, proper music for getting wasted to and an outside area for when you need fresh air!
• Minus Points: Doesn't look very pretty, and though well attended, seldom gets packed
• Overall Rating: 9 out of 10